Sunday, July 27, 2014

Dooms day.

I don't stress over anything. I don't need to, since usually the things worth stressing over mean nothing to me, or can be solved easily enough so no great emotions are needed. How ever, even I admit that at this moment, this trip thing is getting to me.

First of all the original car got pushed back for 5 weeks, and a friend from the forum was kind enough to go and order a car from me from LA. All good, and it will be there around the 8th. That's 22 days of going insane.

Today, BEFORE I had had any coffee, dear spouse informs me that he's vacation starts this week, not on the next. Fine, 15 day road trip it is then. I don't usually get pissed of tiny hick ups, since planning is not my thing,  but I already had trouble of finding stuff to do for the first eight, and now it's 15 days of doing something, and then a road trip. Of course I could go later, but the thing is, pay  back is a bitch. I have scheduled a million things for next week, so there is no way I will deal with them now, since he has the time off.

So instead of going insane in stores today trying to find all the things I might still need to consider getting, I'm packing up the last pieces of stuff while trying to decide where to go. Germany actually sounds pretty good right now, Yellowstone second. It's an extra week of time to waste, why not do it with style!

Just to count the fuck ups: No car. No plan. Time table screwed. Too mad to get coffee down. Tessa (my 12 old dog) is limping. I think this trip is doomed.

While writing this whine, it started to seem funny again. The hell with plans, I'll see what flights and to where are free in the evening!



Tuesday, July 22, 2014

The Car!






Because it's safe to say no one else than a post member will ever read this, let it be known you all are mean fuckers! This was sent to me by Sspyrops just to mess with me. All in good humor but if this becomes the reality, I will drive to Texas to share a few comments directly with him. Getting shot in the South is not as scary as a Prius in my view.

As usual, I will leave the shopping to the last minute. I did indeed try to go to the campers wonderland store today, actually parked already, but to be honest, all I need is a blanket. I will go to great lengths to avoid any kind of stores other than those keeping milk in stock, so I may have to man up again and try this an other day.

In other news, someone has told my dear relatives about this trip, so till the day to leave comes, and I can indeed claim no communication tools were taken with me (laptop, phone, hotspot, hell probably couple of laptops), I will be haunted to death.Apparently adults do not go on crazy trips and I should consider (do as told) again. I did this, and decided that if I didn't listen them as a teenager, I may as well not start now!

9 days and 3 hours to go. I can't wait to bring this baby to the road, but I bet I will have all the time in the world in the Prius to come up with a name to the one waited for!

Lups

Planning

The end of July is approaching fast, and I'm starting to panic with this whole thing. It's
 been 12 years since I have done anything this stupid, so better make this count for every missed year.

This is the first entry of Lups idiotic road journal of 2014: Road trip in America.

In order for the possible one reader who may or may not find this while I'm doing this, let me explain how this worked in the old world. We used to pick a country, say Sweden and then just go there. Usually the country picked was somewhere in the middle of the whole trip, and it actually never was the main thing in the trip, just something to use as a focus point. Here it's not realistic to even try to see so much, and the picking up places to see is not that easy, I rolled the dice. I'm going alone, why not do what ever I want to do!

The only real stop planned is LA, since my car will show up there around the 8th. Other than that anything could be seen, but I hate big cities, I hate traffic, I don't like most people, and I'm horribly mean without good coffee, so sticking to back roads and finding out about stuff that only I could actually care about seems like the option to take.

I as a foreigner have of course  too many ideas where not to go. Everything south of Utah and I will get shot, I don't speak Kentucky as proven every time I try to get my order for dinner right in the drive in, in Maine I would just get fatter by feasting on lobsters. This narrows down the possibilities a lot, and by not looking at the size of the map in front of me, I have come up with a plan.

The first thing to do is not to tell the spouse the car won't arrive till the sixth, and run away on the first. Some think this is not communication, but let me once again mention that I married an Audi driver. The next decision is to come up with a plan that will facilitate this early getaway.

As usual, this is iron solid plan, nothing will change on the way to the day of departure. I got a nice idea earlier about disappearing to Yellowstone for about eight days, but yesterday a local friend of mine told me about Sea fair or something held here on the first weekend of August. Let's see if camping wins this, but it's still eight days to waste. I'm going to go to the general are of the Great Lakes, they have always had an appeal to me, and as a Nordic creature water is always loved without salt in it. I have been informed that there are a lot to see, mainly corn in Indiana, Chicago in my books still is shooting gangsters, and with any luck at all, I'll just find myself from a cotton field in Louisiana, or from a belly of an alligator in Florida. No navigation systems make all this possible. 

Now, this blog will be written because of the great reviews boys at the Bimmerpost have written about their new cars. I love reading their thoughts about their babies, and making fun of the folks who take this whole ordeal as seriously as I have is a method of relaxing to me.

 I have collected the greatest hits for a long time from the forum, and I will do my best to answer all the important questions presented there. Quick listing of those of course will include seat logo sounds,  can one have sex in the boot (I will get drunk one night and get the models to perform this stunt from some bar, as a future owner of an M I do understand no sex will be ever had by me again), how much luggage can one haul around in one, how many miles did it take to break it, and how awful the service people somewhere are.

This will be a blog about the rental car I will want to kill every second while stuck with it (Yellowstone as a plan has it's merits) and the long and endless wait for the one that should have been here from the start up. I promise this won't be a dull read, and I swear this will take away the itch to do this on your own some day.

Today is planning day for the not planning. I need a tent, which means shopping, which means I rather rewrite this ten times and not move a muscle. If I had actually realized in time, that in order to pull this trough, I have to buy stuff, run around in stores, and annoy myself to death with idiotic details, I would have booked a flight to Honolulu. I just really hope this all is worth it, and the story should match the ones from my youth, since I don't think I can get away with many of these in the future.

9 days till go!

Cheers, Lups